When I love being a Mom

I have come to realize that I wouldn't choose any other job over being a stay-at-home mom. I have my days...actually if I am being honest, there is usually a time every day that I am jealous of my husband for having a daily life outside this house. Here's a conversation from this morning for example: 

Just so no one is confused or jealous,
he normally naps somewhere
 between 1:30 and 4:00. Never the whole time! 

But then literally 5 minutes after this, I decided to bask in the glow of a smiley 9-month-old who is SO enjoying life right now. Why shouldn't he be happy, he got freed from baby jail and gets to practice his new skills.

This is on the way down from getting up and into his toy box. Game Changer.

Last night was one of those rare-for-me nights when I can't sleep and instead lie in bed thinking about my children. My heart hurt I loved them so much. I debated going in their rooms just to make sure they are ok. I let my mind wander - for just a millisecond - and imagine how my life would be destroyed if anything ever happened to them.

I remember doing this in my kitchen as a kid.
 I love how much she loves him.

Time is going so fast. Last week I took Norah to a local amusement park. A mommy / daughter date. She was tall enough to ride even the scary rides. And we did. And she loved them. And I teared up.

I asked her, on this ride, why she was growing up so fast.

 We do so much for our kids. We are just in the process of buying this beauty so we have enough space to haul our kids, the gear and all their little friends around town.

I can tend to focus on the sacrifice I am making. All the things I give up and the places I don't go so that I can be home with my children. But some days, I love being a Mom. These days usually follow the nights my heart hurts for them - the days I am extra sensitive to how fragile this God given perfection is. It's on these days I hold their little hands longer, I listen better, I try not to blink for fear that I may miss something.

Norah has taken to making me bouquet of flowers from our yard.
She jams a little fist-full of flowers in a vase and proudly puts them on the table.
 I watch little bugs crawl around as I eat my lunch, and on my best days, it fills me with joy.